a special pms mood. i am emotional and slightly cranky. i would like to attribute it to the upcoming birthday but i think it's just good old pms.
E has been working early hours driving the homeless around and so he gets up around 4 am. he's usually pretty quiet but for some reason i've been waking up lately when he leaves. and when i do i wake up, i wake up long enough to realize that i need to pee. once i go potty i realize that i'm hungry. two days in a row now i have had a snack at 4:30am. nice huh? yesterday it was a brownie, today it was a weight watchers lemon cake. this just reinforces the fact that if i need to potty or if i'm hungry i can't focus on anything else.
but in my lemon cake eating this morning i couldn't go back to sleep. for one my blue toe was itching - yes, itching under the nail - i don't know if it's trying to heal or if it's about to fall off of my foot but it was driving me crazy. and so i was thinking how i should blog about my itchy blue toe, whether anyone would appreciate a picture of the toe, and other random things i could blog about (ie. my obessesive need to eat and pee).
but in all of this stupid blog pondering i came the realization that i think this blogging thing has been good for me. i've always been a somewhat introspective person, always taking the time to figure out why or how i feel about something and often how to address it. but for some reason over the last few years i have become less of a thinker really. not sure why but i think it had a lot to do with a moderate to severe case of depression and the nice drugs that made me feel nothing. but i think i'm back to thinking. my blog is like the friend that you always think "i shoud tell them about this" or "so and so will think this is so funny." always an internal dialogue...i wonder if it's weird that i'm always processing a blog post. but honestly, i think it's good for me and helps me order some things in my brain - silly and serious. i always tried journaling on paper but it never really worked for me - i must i admit i like the interactive element. it's nice to get the encouragement, the laughs.
anyway, those are some thoughts for the day.
half-marathon - 5 days away - thank goodness. for some reason i am wanting to flake on my exercise this week but i'm not gonna. i'm going to the gym this afternoon.
i heard this story on npr this morning. An estimated 90,000 people in Los Angeles County are homeless...why do we let this happen?
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ooh, good blogging. I'm always composing a blog in my head too, preparing for it. And I think I'm glad you didn't post a photo of your toe, seeing as how I have my own icky runner's toe (sounds much more impressive than black toe). I'm struggling also with working out this week but mostly because I've run out of time for EVERYTHING. So why am I blogging? ugh. Well so you have had some great cheap therapy with blogging and I have a feeling that's what a lot of people do with it... whether anyone's reading it or not.
Got my email confirmation today for the RACE - let's go hit the expo when it's most convenient for you.
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